Weekend Wrap

I have a sleeping baby next to me, and only 20minutes to have this post done; before the school pick up. Ryder who normally goes down for his day nap between 11 & 12, didn't crash until 2pm today! So, in a cruel twist of the sleepless-baby-world that I live in, I'll have to wake him soon to get to Ella's school by 3pm at the latest! Ugh!

Our weekend was busy. But delightful.

Friday kicked off with a sunset park play with our special friends; Kirsty, Jet & Brodie. Followed by Chris cooking a delicious dinner and Ryder going to bed without a fight - BLISS! Chris and I enjoyed a slow night of red wine, peanut M & M's and lots of {overdue} conversation. It was so deliciously lovely.

We headed to an indoor playground on Saturday morning for one of Ella's classmate's party. And celebrated being five!

Ryder tagged along and enjoyed every moment.

When we returned home at midday, I savoured a long {much needed} nap with my boy, while Ella and Chris headed out on a sushi date.

Later that afternoon, we went down the coast to check out Chris's parents new house and stay for dinner. The house was fab - I love it! And can see many family get togethers there. The company was great, the champagne flowed and the Thai takeaway was delish. The kids enjoyed a bubble bath and danced along to Pa playing the keyboard. I haven't seen Tony play in about 5 years - it was lovely, and everything I imagined their new house would bring.

Both kids passed out in the car on the drive home and easily transferred into bed, allowing Chris and I some time to enjoy more wine and chats. Cold, wintery Saturday nights beg for wine and couch chats, don't they?

Sunday morning; the kids and I enjoyed a scrumptious breakfast out at a local cafe with a few of my girlfriends. Although chaotic {2 toddlers and 2 5yr olds}, it's these kind of things that make my heart sing. Things like still having a social life with kids in tow. Good food and the bestest of friends, who love my kids and embrace them fully - all of us enjoying life together.

And a quick park play afterwards to burn off some pancake/hot chocolate bursts!

Chris is in the USA this week. His first American trip. It's a very quick {and last minute} business trip and although he is only just about to board the plane now - I miss him already. Thankfully we have a special 'date weekend' planned on his return to soften the blow of being a single Mum for the next 5 days.

I'm using this week to get some stuff done around the house - tile grout needs cleaning, front door needs scrubbing, outdoor furniture needs oiling - fun stuff like that!!! As well as really dig into some work. I think I will use this week to finally finish my children's chapter book. I plan to snuggle into bed early each night with my laptop, a coffee and some chocolate and just write, write, WRITE! However, with a runny nosed boy - I know the best plans can still fall a part....so we'll just take it day by day!

How was your weekend?

Have a great week all.

First Jazz Exam. Tick.

I have very vague memories of my first dance exam. I remember my Mum carefully criss-crossing the satin ribbons of my ballet shoes up around my ankle. I remember the old hall with wooden floor boards and the grand aged piano in the corner. But I don't really remember the emotions or music or flow of the day. I was probably around 5 years old.

My Mum recently told me that she had to take a day off work to take me to my first ballet exam, and she required a Doctor's Certificate to do so. So, off to the Doc she went....faking a bug of some sort. Oh, the things we do as Mums!

Today, was Ella's first dance exam. She's danced on stage and understands the notion of performing and entertainment. But until today, she had never been exposed to the experience of being watched and judged and assessed.

Our little sunshine did well.

She has been excited for weeks. Constantly blaring the song in the car and in the lounge room....practicing, counting, listening.

Dancing - always dancing her little heart out.

It was a quick exam. Four little five year olds - in and out of the room within a 10minute time frame. But she came out beaming. She had a medal in her hand and a sense of pride in completing something new. Something big and significant.

I felt so full of love for how awesome she is. Our little bug is growing up.

I love her!

And to celebrate, before heading off to school for the day.....we had a quick McDonald's treat...

Over pancakes and hashbrowns and chocolate milk; we talked about the exam and how great she felt. She told me all about the examiner.....all whilst clenching her medal close.

On arrival at school, {an hour and a half into the school day} a group of her classmates ran up to her, embracing her wildly. "Where have you been Ella?" "We missed you!" And I smiled and felt forever grateful for the wonderful life she has. Surrounded by so many beautiful souls, egging her on in this journey of life.

Happy Friday All.

We have a park play date organised for this afternoon followed by a weekend full of fun.

Cheers to that!

Health Update & Thank-You.

Before I start this post, I really need to acknowledge the HUGE outpour of love and support I received on my previous post, and my facebook wall. THANK YOU! I was bombarded with comments, texts and emails. And this was a good bombarding! It was inspiring and heart-touching. You all lifted my Spirit, out of the atmosphere! I honestly feel like I can get through ANYTHING, with so many amazing people {people I know personally and people who are online strangers friends} So, to all of YOU, who have taken the time to comment, message, email, call or send me some LOVE - I say Thank You! Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

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To be honest, when all of this 'health drama' began several weeks ago - I hesitated with posting about it. I just wanted to get it over and done with; and then move on. I contemplated not mentioning here on my blog. Although I reveal a lot of our life here in this space - there is still a lot I don't. Like all families, we have our sacred time, unplanned mishaps and our privacy. Not everything that happens in my life is written about on this blog. This blog is a positive place - a space to document our life.

But then, I realised it would be very fake and unfair if I was only ever posting about the fab things that happen to me. Yeah they're noteworthy and always deserve a post. Of course, I want to capture and cherish the great things in my life - and not a day goes by that I don't feel grateful for the abundance of goodness in the life I live. But the not-so-good-times deserve recognition too. It wouldn't be a true account of our family life, if I omit the hard times and never mention the crappy days too! Life is full of ups and downs and many hurdles. This health scare is one them. I will write about it. I will share my story. And maybe, just maybe, it will help you through a similar time. Sometimes just knowing that there is someone else out there, who has gone through {or still is} the same experience as you, can be so reassuring and so calming. And that's one of my favourite parts of this blogging gig - the connections I've made through it. The stories and emails I get from people who thank me for my honesty and sharing my life, inspire me to not only continue sharing, but to live a better life.

Ok....enough of the sentimental ramble....

UPDATE:

We headed back to the specialist on Tuesday morning - all four of us. Hey, a family who heads to specialist appointments together, stays together {haaa....no?} A McDonalds stop for coffee and hash-browns calmed some nerves.

And the results from the Biopsy were then revealed - I have High Grade, CIN3 Cervical Disease. There, I said it. My name is Claire - I'm 30 - a Mother of two - and a wife who lives a healthy, positive lifestyle....oh, and I have a disease. A disease that if left untreated will turn cancerous and spread. A disease that I've had long enough to go from level 1 to level 3. A disease that has some symptoms, but not many that would make you consider there being a worrisome problem.

YET....a disease that is easily treated if caught in time {which is my case....thankfully}.

TREATMENT:

I'm booked in for surgery later this month. I'll be put to sleep and the effected part of my cervix removed by incision.

Regular checkups after that, for the rest of my life, but recovery should be bearable, and my good health should return.

THE HARDEST PART:

My specialist who will do the surgery, asked Chris and I about our plans to have more children. He is quite concerned that the effects of this disease with this surgery and 'tampering of my cervix' along with my already missing left fallopian tube and damaged left ovary, will leave me infertile. No guarantees. It's a case-by-case thing.

I guess, that news isn't that bigger deal. No, we're not planning on anymore children. We are already blessed with four kids {Ebony, Jayden, Ella and Ryder} and life is pretty perfect as it is. We're happy. We feel complete.

But, there is a difference between making that choice of not having children.....and having that choice taken away from you. We all like to have control over our lives - our futures. No one likes to be told that that control has been taken away, and you don't get a say.

It made me see the light clearer with this topic. Although having children hasn't always been plain sailing for us - it hasn't been a long, heartbreaking process either. I know so many people who want so badly to be parents - yet are unable to, or have to turn to other fertility options. I have a better understanding of how that must feel now.   

BUT.....as I said in my last post - I am going to trust the process. What will be, will be! Everything Most things pan out just as they're meant to - I'm learning that now!

Things get thrown into perspective when scares like this happen don't they?! Life becomes more obvious. Goals become more defined. We become more aware of life and love and things that make us happy.

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Over the past few weeks, and even more so; since my last post, I am realising how common this disease is. So many of you have commented saying you had experienced similar results in the past. I guess we can only be grateful that we live in a developed world where Pap Smears, diagnosis and treatment is so easily accessible. It's the underdeveloped countries that are seeing huge rates of women dying from such diseases, and that breaks my heart! How is that fair?!

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I'll keep you all posted with how the surgery goes. But for now....it's time to move on....to move forward....

In other news......

My PRINT STORE has changed! Did you notice?? Yes, still looks the same - and the prints are still the same.....but I no longer print and post. You are now purchasing Printable PDF emailed designs. I have slashed all prices {now that I am not printing, trimming and posting} and have given some printing and framing tips on my site. ENJOY the low costs and please enjoy this code: APRIL2013 which will give you 10% off orders in my store until the end of April. SHOP HERE.

Chris took a nasty fall from his Triathlon Road Bike yesterday. he was traveling at almost 40km/hour down a wet road and lost traction on an oily patch of the road. His leg is badly grazed. Really, really  bad in fact! Poor little Ryder has such a beautiful heart and is so worried for Chris. He is constantly pointing at the open wounds and saying "Oh Ohh" over and over, before giving Chris a pat for comfort ;)

Ella and I have been talking a lot lately about being a good friend, and doing what's right. I recently bought this book, and read it to her a few days ago. It was a great conversation starter about bullying and having empathy.

I'm really loving her being five. We have some great conversations together. My little buddy and I. Five seems so big, yet is still so small. I like that. 

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Ok, Happy Friday All.

Cheers to this supportive, beautiful online community!

Here's to moving on....moving forward.....

I have a date with two fab friends and 6 crazy kids.....perfect way to spend a Friday I think!

Message to Teenage Me.

I know, I know.

Better late than never though!

This was meant to be posted online last year. But technology and life and general busy-ness managed to get in the way. And yesterday, it occurred to me how lazy it was of me...to NOT get it online!

We have a message to spread. So.... I finally got that message online for ALL to see.

It's so important to let today's teenagers know that life IS worth living. That high school DOES end. And THEY have the power to live a full, happy and successful life. They can BE THE CHANGE. They CAN be happy.

Here it is:

ENJOY! And a huge thank you to those who contributed to it. Mwah!

Share the love link :)

On The Night You Were Born.

On the night you were born,

the moon smiled with such wonder

that the stars peeked in to see you

and the night wind whispered,

"Life will never be the same."

Because there had never been anyone like you.....

ever in the world.

So enchanted with you were the wind and the rain

that they whispered the sound of your wonderful name.

RYDER NICHOLAS!

Not once had there been such eyes,

such a nose,

such silly, wiggly, wonderful toes.

Heaven blew every trumpet

and played every horn

on the wonderful, marvelous

night you were born.

{Above words taken from the book: On The Night You Were Born, by Nancy Tillman. We were given this book by my brother Spencer, his wife Heidi and their 3 kids, to welcome in our new baby boy. From the moment I read this book, I fell in love with it!}

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Dear Ryder,

You are one! ONE years old already.

We love you so, so much. A love so deep that is just for you and us.

You bring us so much joy, so much happiness, so many laughs and so much love. Together with your sister, we feel like the luckiest parents in the world.

You are everything to us! And what a wonderful year it has been.

On the night you were born in November of 2011; the world changed - it became a better, brighter, more beautiful place. All because of you!

Love Mummy and Daddy x

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You can see Ryder's first birthday celebrations here :)

Day Four - Whitehaven Beach, I mean Whiteheaven.

I believe that life comes in waves & peaks. Sometimes it feels like ease and joy are blanketing us in abundance, and other times, we have to reach deep to find our peace, smiles and happiness. Sometimes, when life is going well....so well....I can't help but worry when the next 'wave' will come. What's going to go wrong? Surely I can't be so lucky to have all this....and then not be punished afterwards, or at least experience something crappy to bring me back down to earth. I know this is a false way of thinking, but coming from someone who's experienced the highs of life, and the lows, I can't help but be apprehensive of the present....and the future.

Also, to be honest, sometimes, on this blog, and in my life, I feel like I need to follow up every positive with a negative. Just so I don't offend or upset, or mislead. Sometimes I worry so much about adding a disclaimer that I forget to bask in the actual joy of a moment. Or I bask in it....but then feel guilty, like I'm gloating or baosting or making someone feel low.

But tonight.....I'm taking all this good, all this joy and seeping it for everything it's worth. I'm feeling grateful and accepting and hey, hell....I want to boast & share & scream to the world....that today was fricken amazing! It was so blissfully perfect that I don't even have a disclaimer or a negative to squeeze in to soften the blow..... Every minute of it was good. So here goes:

After a slow happy morning of buffet breakfasts, coffee and sea breezes, I took Ella down to the pool while Ryder napped upstairs by Chris's side. He napped for TWO HOURS! This never happens. He's not named the '30minute bandit' for nothing :)

After more coffee, and a relax...... a helicopter picked us up. Yes a helicopter, a real one....

And took us soaring. On top of the world.

The view was more than breathtaking. It was surreal. Like I was watching a movie or dreaming.....

It's weird. I hate flying. With all my might. It terrifies me.

But today, in that tiny little helicopter, although scared at first..... I felt ok. Maybe it was my inner voice inside me telling me to sucker up....coz with adventure & dreams & bucket lists & beauty....sometimes comes pain and facing fears. But with that view, and my family by my side....I felt fairly safe. I felt like I could take on the world....literally. I was happy.

There was too many inspiring sights to distract me from my crashing & dying fears.

These Whitsunday Islands truly are breathtaking. So much untouched beauty. The best way to unwind.

Simon, our pilot; told us we were going to land.

So, onto Whitehaven Beach we slowly descended.

You know those white sandy beaches & crisp aqua shores you see in the travel brochures and on Getaway? Yeah?! We landed there.

The sun had a warm bite to it, the beach was deserted - all ours, the weather so amazingly perfect. The kids were calm and happy. A smooth energy & excitement buzzed through me.

Hey, as I said: Perfection!!

This is church to me. My family + peace + beach = religion!

Today I felt whole, and good. I felt close to God, or Mother Nature, or something.....something that's bigger than me. Something more significant. I felt content. Content beyond explanation.

I guess this helped:

The pilot provided us with not only an amazing picnic lunch and beach tent, but some champers too. No disclaimer here....no negative. I can't think of one bad bit. It was all magic. All of it.

Ryder ate many handfuls of sand. He thought this Island rocked too. He's such a happy little man...now that he's well again. Truly, he was all smiles the whole time we were there. He's a beach lover.....just like his Mumma and Dadda. He thrives on adventure and experiences. He goes with the flow. No kidding....he has not sooked, cried or been 'hard work' at all this holiday.

We decided that Simon, possibly has the BEST job in the world. After flying us over some of the world's most awe-inspiring views, he then got to spend 2 hours laying in a hammock amongst trees on the shoreline of the pristine beach of Whitehaven, while he waited for us to enjoy time as a family.

And we did.

We were secluded and free. We swam, and ate & drank champagne. We whisked a giggling baby through the clear waters of the Coral Sea and absorbed every ounce. We were present and in the moment, like never before.

Yeah, Ella had a minor meltdown, and sulked in the tent for ten minutes because she was battling her own fears of water, and getting her face wet and the unknown of the deep. But we talked her off the edge, made her feel safe, and moved on. We all have fears & weaknesses. We're working on hers with her. {see there's a little negative. haa}

Life is good. And I'm enjoying it while it lasts....

{excuse the chipped nail polish. I'm a little daggy like that!}

Ryder fell asleep on my lap, in the noisy helicopter on the 15minute flight back. Yes, the 'sleepless boy', has napped everywhere & anywhere this week. He's been amazing. I was ever so slightly hesitant about how he was going to cope this week. But, he's been the easiest and low-maintenance of us all I think :)))

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We had an early dinner at Coco Chu tonight. A new, modern, funky restaurant, along the shoreline.

Oh wow. Possibly some of the best food we've ever eaten. Ever.

Each bite was like a party of flavours. Tantalising and aromatic. I definitely recommend you dine here, if you stay here.

What a day!

I'm exhausted. In a good way!

We're off to bed soon. I wonder what tomorrow will bring?!

Until then.... I'll leave you with tonight's cocktail...... a mango & coconut Margarita! Very VERY good!

G'Night x